Flushing Away Reason: Woodville's Toilet Paper Panic

By Sal Baldovinos

In a twist that feels like déjà vu from the early days of the COVID-19 pandemic, Woodville, Texas is once again facing an unexpected shortage of toilet paper. But this time, it's not a global health crisis causing the run - it's a labor dispute thousands of miles away.

As news broke of the longshoremen's strike affecting 36 ports along the East and Gulf Coasts on October 1, 2024, it didn't take long for panic to set in at our local Walmart. Despite the fact that the vast majority of our toilet paper is made right here in the USA, shoppers began clearing shelves faster than you can say "two-ply."

I caught up with Becky Langston, a Walmart Coach at our Woodville store, who's been watching this unfold firsthand. "We started seeing a run on toilet paper as soon as the news of the strike broke," Langston told me, shaking her head in disbelief.

Now, let's pause for a moment and consider the absurdity of this situation. We're talking about a product that's 90% manufactured within our borders. The dock workers' strike, while significant for many imported goods, shouldn't be causing a toilet paper apocalypse. Yet here we are, watching our neighbors stockpile rolls like they're preparing for a bathroom-based doomsday.

Langston assured me that Walmart is on the case. "Corporate communication says they're pushing more trucks for delivery," she explained. "We're getting new shipments every day, though the times vary."

When I asked about her message to worried Woodville residents, Langston was clear: "Don't worry, we're getting shelves filled and out to customers."

But here's the rub, folks. This panic buying is as unnecessary as it is problematic. By creating an artificial shortage, we're putting strain on a supply chain that's already dealing with the ripple effects of the port strikes. It's like we're flushing common sense down the drain along with our abundant toilet paper.

Let's remember that while the longshoremen's strike is indeed a significant event, affecting half of our nation's ocean shipping and involving nearly 50,000 workers fighting for fair wages and job security, it doesn't mean we're going to run out of toilet paper anytime soon.

So, Woodville, let's take a collective deep breath. Maybe check our closets for the stash we probably still have from 2020. And perhaps, just perhaps, we can approach this situation with a bit more... shall we say... regularity.

After all, if we can weather a global pandemic, surely we can handle a temporary blip in our bathroom tissue supply without losing our... you know what.

- Sal Baldovinos